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Play Ball!

Picture it. My son was at bat playing rookie ball. 9 years old. He was waiting to receive a pitched ball from a “controlled-velocity pitching machine.” Nada. And when I say “nada” I mean “nada.” He stood at home plate a full ten minutes while parents tried frantically to figure out why the machine wasn’t working. While it wasn’t the real seventh inning stretch, it sure felt like it.

There are lots of ways he could have handled it. The amygdala (fear-based) response? Fight, flight, or freeze. He didn’t do any of those. Remaining at the plate, he held up his bat and waited. He chose differently.

As I remember that hot summer morning, that moment etched itself on me. I learned from him.

Acceptance not Patience

Character develops in small experiences like these not always the grandiose gestures we associate with growth from movies and books. My son accepted the moment, without strings. He didn’t try to change it or shape it to what he wanted. He saw the parents were doing their job fixing the pitching machine so he could focus on his.

Some might call that patience and, yes, that’s true. But patience is also ego-based. It’s an act of willpower; it comes from the self. Acceptance is different. Acceptance means surrendering your will. For me, that’s about surrendering my will to something greater than myself.

Stuck

Waiting at bat for 10 minutes may “strike” you as the very definition of stuckness. He couldn’t go forward (hit the ball) or backwards (prevent the pitching machine from breaking down). He was stuck at home plate.

Mostly, you want to escape the feeling of feeling stuck. You distract yourself or make a decision simply because you need to escape the discomfort inherent with “in-between.”

Getting unstuck requires seeing things in multiple perspectives. You choose your perspective in every situation. You can choose to suffer, sit in discomfort, or be happy. It’s up to you because you have free will.

Sitting in the Moment

I admire my son’s ability to be present, not anticipating the future or catastrophizing the situation. How easy it is to extrapolate from a current situation and become fear-based.

“Oh no, the pitching machine is broken. It’s NEVER going to get fixed and I’ll be stuck at bat forever. They’ll have to call off the game and then they’ll have to figure out a re-match date. I hope we can get enough players to attend the re-match.”

Instead, by dancing in this moment, he responded to current circumstances with fortitude. He knew he could handle it and he did.

Take me out to the ballgame

Remember that song “Take me out to the ballgame” that they play in the seventh inning stretch? One of the lyrics says,

Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack.

I don’t care if I never get back.

It sums up what happened that hot summer morning at a baseball field in Etobicoke. Accept the moment for what it is (buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack), choose a perspective that works for you (I don’t care if I never get back), and experience the situation right now, not in the past or future (notice the song is in the present tense).

Header Photo by Eduardo Balderas on Unsplash, Glove photo by benjamin hershey on Unsplash, Caramel Corn Photo by Robert Anasch on Unsplash, Peanuts Photo by Vladislav Nikonov on Unsplash

While the amygdala response is real, based on gut reactions, you don’t have to react to it. Give yourself the space seen between the pitcher (action) and the batter (response). In that space, you can choose differently.

You have to be open minded in order to grow. The coaching that Laura gave me opened my eyes to what and how I was doing things and allowed me to see the bigger picture. I am not done yet but I already see the changes in my everyday life.

MM

I think coaching is a great way to help you clear your mind when you get stuck with overwhelming situations or when stepping into changes in your life.

MO

Coaching is life changing. It pushes you outside your comfort zone and challenges your perspectives.  It is highly motivating and the exercises and techniques used are both fun and informative.  I think the main benefits of coaching are to see yourself, others and the world more clearly.  I think coaching is valuable to anyone regardless of where you are in your life or career.

LE

I honestly never thought I’d need a coach. I thought coaching was for CEOs and industry VIPs. I didn’t think it was for the “little guys” (i.e. me). Now, I’m of the belief that everyone – yes, EVERYONE – needs a coach. Coaching has really benefitted me and I’m so grateful to have had that time with Laura. It’s changed my life!

VB

Laura is very patient. She took the time to understand what was causing me to be stuck where I am today and help me build a better vision so I can continue to grow.

MM

I think Laura’s coaching was what I had been waiting for. Laura was so approachable, kind, and open. Her willingness to help and support made a difference for me. I found in her coaching new strategies, ideas, and perspectives that I could incorporate into my goals and objectives that I didn’t see before.

MO

Laura is an incredibly intuitive, positive and caring coach. Her techniques helped me recognize both my strengths and areas I might want to explore as I embark on the next chapter of my career. The exercises she employed were instrumental in providing self perspective and challenging my frames of reference.

LE

Laura is a natural coach. Her probing and compassionate questions helped me learn about myself: my value system, interests, goals and strengths.

LM

Coaching sessions with Laura gave me new perspectives on how to process specific feelings and situations in life.  She showed me how to sit with my emotions, acknowledge them, and then use visualization strategies to move through them.  I now feel more confident and in control of how I choose to walk through life.

CP

From the beginning, Laura put me at ease, creating a safe, open space for me to talk and share freely without fear of judgement. I loved the variety of approaches she used depending on the topic we were working on and it was fun being able to try out things I wouldn’t have considered before! With Laura’s coaching, I substantially grew my confidence in the workplace, overcame fears, dealt with issues I’d been carrying around for many years and, most importantly, learned to value myself and define a path forward into the future.

AG

Laura’s coaching was a breath of fresh air and EXACTLY what I needed at that point of my life. I didn’t realize how impactful coaching was going to be, but by the end of the sessions together, I left feeling refreshed, inspired and genuinely curious about what my future held for me. Because of Laura and her coaching, I believe I became a better person – someone who is more open-minded, someone with a clearer focus, and someone who is willing to explore opportunities and possibilities far more than I ever did before.

VB

I engaged Laura for coaching as I took on an expanded role leading an asset management company in Canada. As a female, I knew I would be a role model and had high expectations of myself. I was feeling overwhelmed and anxious.

In our first few coaching sessions we worked through exercises that allowed me to reflect on my purpose, leadership style and what mattered most to me. I continue to be grounded by the clarity I achieve in my coaching sessions – allowing me to be resilient and confident when challenges came my way.

OS