Quick! How do you get what you want – through change or transformation? Wait, aren’t they the same thing?
I used to see change and transformation as synonyms. Not anymore.
Richard Rohr gave me new definitions. He describes change as new beginnings whereas transformation starts earlier, with the destruction of the old.
Change: New Beginnings
Launching a business as an entrepreneur changed me. Instead of a regular paycheque from my employer, I became both employer and employee of “Laura Barker Coaching.” It felt exciting and terrifying at the same time.
My decision to start my own business as a career coach was a new beginning.
Transformation: Destruction of the Old
Transformation requires more of you. It occurs at a deeper level as you get rid of what no longer serves you. While it doesn’t need to be painful to be effective, it often is. Pain forces you to pay attention, so it serves a purpose.
In my case, quitting my disastrous project management job was transformative. By destroying the old, I could welcome the new. In fact, I see now that I had to experience the pain of this job to land where I am today. Otherwise, I’d have stuck to my creature comforts and remained dissatisfied.
You experience transformation at significant points in your life: the loss of a job, a new baby, the death of a parent. Whether you seek it, or not, it’s necessary for your holistic (mind, body, heart, spirit) growth.
Scale
I view the difference between change and transformation as one of scale.
On the one hand, you have change. Change is typically self-driven. You may say, “I want to change ‘x.’ These are my options.” Then you make a decision.
On the other hand, transformation is done “for” you (not “to” you), by external circumstances usually, in order to force a deeper reckoning.
Both are necessary for a life fully loved.
Getting What You Want
Getting what you want means achieving a desired outcome:
- I want fulfilment in my work;
- I want to get out of the weeds and gain more clarity:
- I want more balance in my life.
To get to the outcome, something must happen. In other words,
How do you get from “here” to “there?”
When you can identify movement between these two points, you have, by definition, grown as a person. Growth occurs by changing or through transformation.
Process
Growth is a process. Processes act as blueprints – something you can follow to get what you want.
The mistake I’ve made is seeing processes as purely linear. Processes appeal to the logical left-brained rational mind. But ask anyone who has experienced grief whether it obediently follows Kubler-Ross’s five (5) stages in sequential order, and you’ll learn it doesn’t. You move between stages at different rates and loop back to one stage or another. They’re not always linear.
The left brain needs the support of the right brain to take in the whole, not just segments (“stages”), to find patterns and themes. The right brain’s process isn’t linear but circular. Equally valid; just different.
Growth
Change and transformation thus create growth through a process that moves you from here to there. You do it because you want to get “there,” which is your desired outcome.
What change or transformation do you need to make in your life?
Header Photo by Shaurya Sagar on Unsplash, Photo by Jan Tinneberg on Unsplash, Photo by Peter Herrmann on Unsplash, Photo by Pablo Merchán Montes on Unsplash