Boost your Positive Intelligence. Build core mental fitness skills.

Being Authentic

Norval Morriseau image

What does it mean to be authentic?

A few days ago, Ontario police charged three separate criminal rings for forging fake Norval Morrisseau paintings worth tens of millions of dollars. They described the forgeries as an “assembly-line” producing thousands of fakes, so many they don’t know for sure how many are currently in circulation.

You’re left with a fundamental question: which ones are phony and which ones are real?

Phony vs. Real

People long for authenticity. They want to show their real selves instead of hiding behind phony images they’ve crafted to protect themselves for fear of rejection, offending, or not fitting in.

Phoniness – or inauthenticity – also comes from people pleasing. Hard-wired people pleasers struggle with being authentic because of a lifetime spent moulding themselves around people and circumstances.

One day, you wake up and ask yourself, Where do you end and I begin? Because your identity is not clear. Your malleability has led you to this moment. While it was a gift at an earlier stage in life that let you cope in many situations, now it’s a hindrance. It prevents you from revealing who you really are.


Of course, a lot comes down to boundaries. Many people have weak or porous boundaries. What I’ve learned is no one has power over me unless I give it to them.

When I give away my power, freely and of my own accord, because of my own disordered boundaries, I can’t turn around and call myself the victim. It’s my responsibility to build appropriate boundaries.

Within my borders, I can get clear on who I am, represented by my values. That’s the first step to an authentic life, gaining clarity with myself.

Authenticity is Powerful

Being authentic translates to sharing your thoughts, opinions, and heart-felt convictions appropriately. It’s not about oversharing but a willingness to share “scars not wounds,” something I heard Aprille Franks describe brilliantly in a podcast last year.

It means expressing your vulnerability from a place of empowerment, where you encourage people to get to the other side through your words and actions, because you’ve done it. You’ve got the scars to prove it.

Vulnerability Leads to Connection

The longing you feel to show your authentic self is Spirit pulling you in the direction you need to go. It’s a process of revealing not becoming. When you’re authentic, you reveal who you are. You don’t need to become someone else as a protective mechanism.

It takes courage to be authentic. Vulnerability seems scary. You want to protect yourself at all costs from being hurt. Yet the price of protecting yourself is isolation from your inner self and the people around you. And humans are called primarily to be in union – connected – to one another.

Authenticity means feeling comfortable in your own skin. You experience congruence inside and out. You communicate how you feel instead of blocking it.

Keep in mind, authenticity isn’t just sharing hard stuff. Often that’s where the mind goes when this topic comes up. It is also about sharing joys and successes. Shining your light not dimming it.

Marianne Williamson says it beautifully in her prayer, Our Deepest Fear.

… We are all meant to shine,

As children do.

We were born to make manifest

The glory of God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us;

It’s in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine,

We unconsciously give other people

Permission to do the same …

Header Photo by Norval Morrisseau, Shaman, serigraph print, late 1970s

How can you be more authentic today?

You have to be open minded in order to grow. The coaching that Laura gave me opened my eyes to what and how I was doing things and allowed me to see the bigger picture. I am not done yet but I already see the changes in my everyday life.


I think coaching is a great way to help you clear your mind when you get stuck with overwhelming situations or when stepping into changes in your life.


Coaching is life changing. It pushes you outside your comfort zone and challenges your perspectives.  It is highly motivating and the exercises and techniques used are both fun and informative.  I think the main benefits of coaching are to see yourself, others and the world more clearly.  I think coaching is valuable to anyone regardless of where you are in your life or career.


I honestly never thought I’d need a coach. I thought coaching was for CEOs and industry VIPs. I didn’t think it was for the “little guys” (i.e. me). Now, I’m of the belief that everyone – yes, EVERYONE – needs a coach. Coaching has really benefitted me and I’m so grateful to have had that time with Laura. It’s changed my life!


Laura is very patient. She took the time to understand what was causing me to be stuck where I am today and help me build a better vision so I can continue to grow.


I think Laura’s coaching was what I had been waiting for. Laura was so approachable, kind, and open. Her willingness to help and support made a difference for me. I found in her coaching new strategies, ideas, and perspectives that I could incorporate into my goals and objectives that I didn’t see before.


Laura is an incredibly intuitive, positive and caring coach. Her techniques helped me recognize both my strengths and areas I might want to explore as I embark on the next chapter of my career. The exercises she employed were instrumental in providing self perspective and challenging my frames of reference.


Laura is a natural coach. Her probing and compassionate questions helped me learn about myself: my value system, interests, goals and strengths.


Coaching sessions with Laura gave me new perspectives on how to process specific feelings and situations in life.  She showed me how to sit with my emotions, acknowledge them, and then use visualization strategies to move through them.  I now feel more confident and in control of how I choose to walk through life.


From the beginning, Laura put me at ease, creating a safe, open space for me to talk and share freely without fear of judgement. I loved the variety of approaches she used depending on the topic we were working on and it was fun being able to try out things I wouldn’t have considered before! With Laura’s coaching, I substantially grew my confidence in the workplace, overcame fears, dealt with issues I’d been carrying around for many years and, most importantly, learned to value myself and define a path forward into the future.


Laura’s coaching was a breath of fresh air and EXACTLY what I needed at that point of my life. I didn’t realize how impactful coaching was going to be, but by the end of the sessions together, I left feeling refreshed, inspired and genuinely curious about what my future held for me. Because of Laura and her coaching, I believe I became a better person – someone who is more open-minded, someone with a clearer focus, and someone who is willing to explore opportunities and possibilities far more than I ever did before.


I engaged Laura for coaching as I took on an expanded role leading an asset management company in Canada. As a female, I knew I would be a role model and had high expectations of myself. I was feeling overwhelmed and anxious.

In our first few coaching sessions we worked through exercises that allowed me to reflect on my purpose, leadership style and what mattered most to me. I continue to be grounded by the clarity I achieve in my coaching sessions – allowing me to be resilient and confident when challenges came my way.