Leaders, Let Them Fail

Changemaker
03 March 2024

Do not judge me by my success, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.

Nelson Mandela

Mandela demonstrates resilience to the nth degree, defined as “the capacity to withstand or to recover quickly from difficulties.” Resilience stems from failure, resistance, and setbacks.

Readers, today I want to explore how leaders can build resilience in their teams by letting them fail. Done correctly, resilience strengthens problem solving which supports the successful functioning of a healthy business.

Generational Differences

Let’s start by clarifying generational workforce divisions, understanding that generational behaviours at a macro level don’t, of course, preclude recognizing people as individuals.

Here’s how I’d sketch the perception of resilience by each generation:

Boomer: Pick yourself up and get moving! Persevere and you’ll overcome adversity.
Gen X: It’s up to you. Develop resilience to ensure your success.
Millennial: Take care of yourself. You’ll bounce back.
Gen Z: Resilience = change. Treat change as a positive so you can make your impact.

Your Generation

As a leader, identify your generation and decide if you perceive resilience according to your cohort. It’s possible you identify with another one. Pick the one that suits you best.

Now I want you to think about your team. Which generation(s) do they belong to? How does their generation interpret resilience?

Pause a moment.

Can you see the potential disconnect between how you view resilience and how your team might? Think about the possible consequences of misalignment based on how each party sees it.

If the capacity to recover from difficulties is what resilience is, knowing how each generation approaches it helps leaders navigate the murky waters of today’s topic, failure.

Anchoring Moments

Dr. Mary Donohue researches how generations interact in the workplace, explaining that each generation shares common anchoring moments meaning “how you frame solutions to your problem.” 1

Anchoring moments, as the phrase implies, ground and instruct. They nurture resilience. Donohue argues if you don’t allow for failure, either as a leader, parent, or friend, you don’t allow for anchoring moments. Without anchoring moments, you don’t acquire the means to find solutions to your problems.

Today’s Workplace

The parents of Millennials (Boomers) provided their kids with mentors and coaches. Millennials experienced Kumon and lots of organized after-school activities which only accelerated in the next generation, Gen Z (parents: Gen X).

With all that instruction and structure, failure was not an option. Failure became externalized (“it’s the teacher’s fault, not the student’s, that he was unable to understand the content”). Anchoring moments found in learning how to navigate tough or awkward conversations, for example, weren’t developed.

As Millennials and now Gen Z entered the workplace, they naturally turned to managers to solve their problems because they were used to parents stepping up on their behalf. Even though some managerial Gen Xers and Boomers resented the role of negotiator/parent in the workplace, that’s what some members of the younger generations expected. Boom! Here you see the clash of generational perspectives.

Let Them Fail

Failure fosters resilience. That’s why I urge you, leaders, to let your team fail. Trust your team to learn from their mistakes. Just ask Miss Frizzle from The Magic School Bus. Or my friend who says, “You don’t fail, you learn.”

Resist the urge to bail out your team at the first sign of struggle. Remind yourself that friction is inherent to the process of achieving goals. The satisfaction derived from achieving goals expands the capacity to withstand future challenges.

Leaders, let them fail.

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