The Power of Storytelling: How Narrative Builds Connection

Changemaker
03 September 2023

The Power of Storytelling: How Narrative Builds Connection

Do you ever wonder the best way to connect with other people?

I’ve got an idea to share with you: storytelling.

Recently, I attended a golf tournament where my desire to make connections came to the fore (no pun intended). The event proved an ideal setting for learning a lesson on the power of storytelling.

Building Connection

I arrived early to grab some breakfast. I walked up to a table with two strangers and asked to join them.

Isn’t this exactly what we encourage our kids to do when they’re in a new situation?

🔑 Say hello.

🤝Introduce yourself.

So I did. And you know what?

They welcomed me. We had a lovely conversation about empty nesting, golf, and our experiences with the Canadian housing market. Storytelling.

The Power of Storytelling

During the tournament, I golfed with three new people. We had a great time! Those hours on the golf course chatting about our professional and personal lives nourished me.

I “filled my well” as Julia Cameron describes so aptly in The Artist’s Way. Filling my well is always about people. Hearing someone’s story is my favourite way to understand what makes people tick.

I know I’m not alone because storytelling is as old as time and remains, in my opinion, the most effective tool for communicating with others.

Communicating Through Stories

Talking with an old friend is comforting precisely because you know how you’ll be received. You know communication short-cuts due to your shared history. Friends know your stories.

Meeting someone new requires you to communicate in new ways. New people don’t know your stories. They don’t know “you.” As such, you need to evaluate which stories are important to your narrative before you decide which ones you want to share.

Your Narrative

I’ve said before that your thoughts are powerful.

What do you think of your stories, specifically, what do they reveal about you?

Be aware that the stories you choose to share about yourself can empower or disempower you.

A lot rides on how you perceive yourself. Are you the victim or hero(ine) of your narrative? Before you answer that, understand that both perspectives likely live within you, depending on how you’re feeling in any given moment.

Thoughts drive your emotions which, in turn, drive your actions. By the time you’re telling your story (“the action”), you have already integrated the thoughts and emotions behind them.

Put simply, you have chosen your narrative path.

Heroic Vulnerability

Feeling empowered does not mean reciting false narratives of constant heroism. No one is the hero in every story.

In truth, there’s a lot more power in vulnerability. Just ask Brene Brown. Admitting your vulnerability can open the door to shared connection in a way that claiming hero status does not.

Life as the hero can be lonely. Trust me, I hear it regularly as a leadership coach. Placed on a pedestal, you stand apart from others and that makes it harder to connect. As a leader, you want to identify the needs of your team so you can lead your flock with compassion. If your team doesn’t open up to you, it’s up to you as their leader to find a way to connect.

What’s the best way to connect? You got it – storytelling!

Making Connections

Next time you’re making connections – networking – think of a story you feel comfortable sharing that describes something about yourself, a quality or experience. Trust that when you speak from your heart, it doesn’t matter what you actually say. It’s about how others feel when they receive your story.

Header Photo by Clay Banks on Unsplash

You have to be open minded in order to grow. The coaching that Laura gave me opened my eyes to what and how I was doing things and allowed me to see the bigger picture. I am not done yet but I already see the changes in my everyday life.
MM

I think coaching is a great way to help you clear your mind when you get stuck with overwhelming situations or when stepping into changes in your life.
MO

Coaching is life changing. It pushes you outside your comfort zone and challenges your perspectives. It is highly motivating and the exercises and techniques used are both fun and informative. I think the main benefits of coaching are to see yourself, others and the world more clearly. I think coaching is valuable to anyone regardless of where you are in your life or career.
LE

I honestly never thought I’d need a coach. I thought coaching was for CEOs and industry VIPs. I didn’t think it was for the “little guys” (i.e. me). Now, I’m of the belief that everyone – yes, EVERYONE – needs a coach. Coaching has really benefitted me and I’m so grateful to have had that time with Laura. It’s changed my life!
VB

Laura is very patient. She took the time to understand what was causing me to be stuck where I am today and help me build a better vision so I can continue to grow.
MM

I think Laura’s coaching was what I had been waiting for. Laura was so approachable, kind, and open. Her willingness to help and support made a difference for me. I found in her coaching new strategies, ideas, and perspectives that I could incorporate into my goals and objectives that I didn’t see before.
MO

Laura is an incredibly intuitive, positive and caring coach. Her techniques helped me recognize both my strengths and areas I might want to explore as I embark on the next chapter of my career. The exercises she employed were instrumental in providing self perspective and challenging my frames of reference.
LE

Laura is a natural coach. Her probing and compassionate questions helped me learn about myself: my value system, interests, goals and strengths.
LM

Coaching sessions with Laura gave me new perspectives on how to process specific feelings and situations in life. She showed me how to sit with my emotions, acknowledge them, and then use visualization strategies to move through them. I now feel more confident and in control of how I choose to walk through life.
CP

From the beginning, Laura put me at ease, creating a safe, open space for me to talk and share freely without fear of judgement. I loved the variety of approaches she used depending on the topic we were working on and it was fun being able to try out things I wouldn’t have considered before! With Laura’s coaching, I substantially grew my confidence in the workplace, overcame fears, dealt with issues I’d been carrying around for many years and, most importantly, learned to value myself and define a path forward into the future.
AG

Laura’s coaching was a breath of fresh air and EXACTLY what I needed at that point of my life. I didn’t realize how impactful coaching was going to be, but by the end of the sessions together, I left feeling refreshed, inspired and genuinely curious about what my future held for me. Because of Laura and her coaching, I believe I became a better person – someone who is more open-minded, someone with a clearer focus, and someone who is willing to explore opportunities and possibilities far more than I ever did before.
VB

I engaged Laura for coaching as I took on an expanded role leading an asset management company in Canada. As a female, I knew I would be a role model and had high expectations of myself. I was feeling overwhelmed and anxious.

In our first few coaching sessions we worked through exercises that allowed me to reflect on my purpose, leadership style and what mattered most to me. I continue to be grounded by the clarity I achieve in my coaching sessions – allowing me to be resilient and confident when challenges came my way.
OS